Instructional charity

At Mite, we are big on the idea that generous living can be passed from parent to child. It is an attribute, a characteristic, some would say a gift of character, that can be nurtured and developed from one generation to another. One of the tools that we have found most useful in teaching generosity to a child is something we call "Instructional Charity."

What do we mean by instructional charity? Well, instructional charity makes a point of recognizing the giving in action. This is not to be taken as an encouragement to blow a trumpet so that all might know how generous you are, but rather, the intent is a shared experience between parent and child when giving is the purpose and passing on a heart for charity is desired.

Take, for example, this scenario:

You and your child walk past a beggar. In an unseen or concealed way, you drop a couple of coins out of your hand into the beggar's cup, never making eye contact or letting your child know that an act of giving has occurred.

A beautiful act of charity has indeed occurred. Your actions have blessed both you and the beggar. However, an opportunity has been lost if your heart is to share your love of giving with your child. How can one capture and share this opportunity with their child in this charitable moment? Consider the same instance while utilizing instructional charity:

You and your child walk past a beggar. Stopping a few steps away from the beggar, you take some money from your pocket and hand it to your child, telling her it would be good to help those in need. Then you ask, "Would we like to give to that person?" Ensure that visual contact is made so the child understands the situation. Note: you should be ready for a wide variety of replies. If your child does not wish to give the money, you follow through with the charitable act.

Hopefully, the instructional event will cause a Q&A session between you and your child. As questions arise, answer them clearly and confidently. Since charity is a matter of the heart, verbosity only tends to muddy the waters. The most important thing to convey is your heart. Your child can read that without a word.

Below are a few more illustrations of Instructional Charity in action:

1. When planning your end-of-the-year contributions, engage your children in the process. Help them understand that this act of charity is important enough to you that you plan it out. Enlighten them on why you are giving to the organizations you have selected. If desired and your planning allows, give your children a say in what organizations receive your end-of-year charity.
2. Share updates or insight on the impact of a donation you gave in the past with your child. Fill them in on how giving makes a difference and how it is exciting to be involved in helping others.
3. If your child's school or your company has a giving campaign, engage with your child in that campaign. Discuss the particulars about the impact to be made and how you and your child can make that impact happen. Keep updated on the progress of the campaign and share updates with your child.